Free Downloads The Defiant Child: A Parent's Guide To Oppositional Defiant Disorder
A much-needed tool that parents of children with O.D.D. can use to identify the source of this turmoil and take back parental control. Dr. Douglas Riley teaches parents how to recognize the signs, understand the attitudes, and modify the behavior of their oppositional child.
Paperback: 224 pages
Publisher: Taylor Trade Publishing; 1 edition (October 1, 1997)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0878339639
ISBN-13: 978-0878339631
Product Dimensions: 6.1 x 0.5 x 9 inches
Shipping Weight: 12 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars See all reviews (132 customer reviews)
Best Sellers Rank: #21,151 in Books (See Top 100 in Books) #70 in Books > Parenting & Relationships > Special Needs #547 in Books > Parenting & Relationships > Parenting
I am a stepfather and married into a package deal: long lost love, defiant teenager. While I was no professional, I knew that there was something terribly wrong with this childs world view and decision making. At times, the anger and open defiance seemed totally nonsensical. I read The Defiant Child and found a GOOD description of my stepchild as well as practical steps you can take to influence the child in positive ways. I had a thoroughly defeated wife who was convinced nothing would work. My having her read the book, she came out of her paralysis and we were able to develop a united front (essential) and started effecting some changes. Our daughter is still no angel but she is sure easier to cope with now. She is even enjoyable at times. You just have to arm yourself with knowledge, patience and love and keep pressing. I found the books insights very helpful and I used them as guidelines in developing my own strategies. I was so impressed with the results that I've gotten, I have GIVEN the book to other "burned out" parents and they love it too. Douglas Riley was a Godsend.
The book describes what parents of ODD kids experience every day. Mr. Riley's suggestions are easily understood and seem natural. The book is easy to read. Then why I did not give it five stars?If you consider buying this book, you probably already tried setting limits, star programs, timeouts, 1-2-3, and many other variations of dog training. You tried and found that both "motivation" and warnings are ignored, and that punishment only fuels more resentment.Now you are stuck, but there is a hope -- Mr. Riley comes with new ideas for better, more severe and more painful punishment; of course all within the limits of the law. You are big and smart, and there are many ways to cause pain to your child without spanking. For example, you could explain that YOU own everything in your home and will take it away if he misbehaves.So, what's wrong with the book?First, the style. Mr. Riley speaks in a very distant, detached voice as if he is not talking about our children, but of some other species: evil, smart, and obviously very dangerous. My first reaction to the book was entirely intuitive -- its ice-cold style FELT wrong.Second, the perception of the real problem. Whey you say "dress up now, we got to go", and your 8 year old answers with "F--- YOU", is it because you need more "parental authority", or because he is lacking some very basic skills needed for everyday life? And if your child is as evil and smart as the book suggests, why his life is such a hell?If you think you have to win the war with your child, no matter what it takes -- this book is for you. If you want to teach your child the skills needed for everyday survival, try reading "The Explosive Child". I made my choice, now it's your turn.
This book is very practical and has a lot of great advice. Be warned, however, that it would be important to read the entire book before implementing some of the methods outlined in the stories. I have been struggling with my strong-willed, angry, defiant child for years. The key here is to communicate in no uncertain terms that you are the parent and he/she is the child. The child has no rights and you have every right to expect their behavior to be respectful and pleasant. For years conflicts with our defiant child have brought division between my husband and myself. Finally, a book that clarifies the situation clearly so that we can both see the ride we are being taken on by our defiant child. Now we have the upper hand, we are able to communicate our genuine love and concern for our child (14-year-old boy), and peace reigns in our home as we are seeing our child turn into a happy, well-adjusted, child instead of defiant, angry, manipulative and unthankful!! After the second week of using these methods my child was pleasant, cooperative, obedient, and talking more. We are now seeing his sense of humor return and enjoying one another.The icing on the cake was that he prepared a gourmet breakfast for me on my birthday! What a pleasant outcome!
We followed the advice in this book, and things just got worse and worse around our house. Then we discovered Dr. Ross Greene's book, The Explosive Child. THAT book is a godsend! If you aren't happy with the way regular behavior modification techniques are working (or not working) for your child, check out Dr. Greene's book.
Dr. Riley's insights and suggestions offered me hope and help when nothing seemed to be working in dealing with a teen who clearly needed limits. Along the wonderful help of our family counselor, this book has made a real difference in helping us to regain control of our own home. Highly recommended to anyone whose child is constantly pushing limits.
One comment I haven't heard yet about this book that may be useful to many parents is that the author frequently references experiences with teens and too often no mention is made of younger children. I think his ideas are wonderful for teens, but if you need help with a younger child--look elsewhere!
I received 'The Defiant Child' at about 2pm Monday and couldn't put it down ( I finished it at 6pm and am now in the process of re-reading it). As I read this helpful and inspiring book, I alternatively laughed, cried, and nodded to the insightful descriptions, words, and ideas of Dr Riley. I felt as if this book was written for me. After having others suggest that my 15 year old daughter may be suffering from everything from conduct disorder or bi-polar..to a normal, but excessive kind of teenage rebellion. This book has helped me to see what may and may not be wrong; and what my husband and I may or may not be doing right when dealing with my daughter. My daughter will probably be sent to a residential treatment center because she violated her probation concerning attending school. I never could quite understood her continued intense fear of going to school even after we had changed her from her old school (where she had been brutally attacked), to not one but two others within three months. Each school was quieter and friendly than the last. Thanks to this book, I am more knowledgeable and aware of ODD and hopefully am not to late to help her to get the treatment she needs, even in such a facility. My only wish is that I could have read to book earlier and perhaps prevented her being sent away. I also wish that I could somehow communicate with Dr Riley . I highly recommend this book to not just ODD parents, but all parents. Thank you Dr Riley
The Defiant Child: A Parent's Guide to Oppositional Defiant Disorder A Parent's Guide to High-Functioning Autism Spectrum Disorder, Second Edition: How to Meet the Challenges and Help Your Child Thrive The Everything Parent's Guide To Sensory Processing Disorder: The Information and Treatment Options You Need to Help Your Child with SPD Dissident Syria: Making Oppositional Arts Official The Hidden Disorder: A Clinician's Guide to Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder in Adults Swear Word Coloring Book for Parents: Unleash your inner-parent!: Relax, color, and let your inner-parent out with this stress relieving adult coloring book. A Parent's Guide to the iPad: Make Learning Fun for Your Child (In Easy Steps) Raising a Healthy, Happy Eater: A Parent's Handbook: A Stage-by-Stage Guide to Setting Your Child on the Path to Adventurous Eating The Sleepeasy Solution: The Exhausted Parent's Guide to Getting Your Child to Sleep from Birth to Age 5 The Pocket Parent Coach: Your Two-Week Guide to Dramatically Improved Life with Your Intense Child The Stress-Proof Child: A Loving Parent's Guide The Out-of-Sync Child Grows Up: Coping with Sensory Processing Disorder in the Adolescent and Young Adult Years The Out-of-Sync Child Has Fun, Revised Edition: Activities for Kids with Sensory Processing Disorder Freeing Your Child from Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder: A Powerful, Practical Program for Parents of Children and Adolescents The Hyperactive Child, Adolescent, and Adult: Attention Deficit Disorder through the Lifespan Mental Health for the Whole Child: Moving Young Clients from Disease & Disorder to Balance & Wellness Last Child in the Woods: Saving Our Children from Nature-Deficit Disorder Smart Love: The Compassionate Alternative to Discipline That Will Make You a Better Parent and Your Child a Better Person The Informed Parent: A Science-Based Resource for Your Child's First Four Years Healing a Parent's Grieving Heart: 100 Practical Ideas After Your Child Dies (Healing a Grieving Heart series)
