Free Downloads How To Raise An Adult: Break Free Of The Overparenting Trap And Prepare Your Kid For Success
"Julie Lythcott-Haims is a national treasure. . . . A must-read for every parent who senses that there is a healthier and saner way to raise our children." -Madeline Levine, author of the New York Times bestsellers The Price of Privilege and Teach Your Children Well"For parents who want to foster hearty self-reliance instead of hollow self-esteem, How to Raise an Adult is the right book at the right time." -Daniel H. Pink, author of the New York Times bestsellers Drive and A Whole New MindA provocative manifesto that exposes the harms of helicopter parenting and sets forth an alternate philosophy for raising preteens and teens to self-sufficient young adulthoodIn How to Raise an Adult, Julie Lythcott-Haims draws on research, on conversations with admissions officers, educators, and employers, and on her own insights as a mother and as a student dean to highlight the ways in which overparenting harms children, their stressed-out parents, and society at large. While empathizing with the parental hopes and, especially, fears that lead to overhelping, Lythcott-Haims offers practical alternative strategies that underline the importance of allowing children to make their own mistakes and develop the resilience, resourcefulness, and inner determination necessary for success.Relevant to parents of toddlers as well as of twentysomethings--and of special value to parents of teens--this book is a rallying cry for those who wish to ensure that the next generation can take charge of their own lives with competence and confidence.
Paperback: 368 pages
Publisher: St. Martin's Griffin (August 2, 2016)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1250093635
ISBN-13: 978-1250093639
Product Dimensions: 5.4 x 1 x 8.3 inches
Shipping Weight: 14.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars See all reviews (207 customer reviews)
Best Sellers Rank: #248 in Books (See Top 100 in Books) #1 in Books > Parenting & Relationships > Parenting > Teenagers
I’ve worked around college-aged kids my entire career. Like the author, I’ve increasingly become concerned about a large population of kids who appear to lack the ability to mature into full-fledged adults. I’ve assumed the cause was the growing trend of overprotective parenting (what many call helicopter parenting), but other than short articles in newspapers and magazines, I never taken the time to read anything more substantial. I hoped this book would provide me with that opportunity and it did…very nicely! Lythcott-Haims’ book is an excellent overview of the problem and a thoughtful collection of ideas designed to remedy the situation.The book crosses genres: it’s both an in-depth research-journalism treatment of the problem, as well as a how-to guidebook outlining specific ways to help resolve it.The first third of the book covers the problem from all angles: historical, sociological, cultural, psychological, and economic. Although there are extensive bibliographical notes at the end, the book covers these concepts in a style that demonstrates good journalism more than in-depth academic research. Well-educated readers will find the book easy to read, entertaining, and compelling. But it’s important to note that Lythcott-Haims is not a sociologist, nor is her book meant to be an academic treatise. She should probably be considered a concerned academic administrator who saw a significant problem in the college-aged population she served and it worried her enough (both as an administrator and as a recent parent) to investigate it further on her own and write a book about it.The book is definitely aimed at well-educated and affluent parents.
I want to make a response to a particular charge about this book - that it only refers to the 1% who can send their children to Harvard or Stanford.It is true that the author's world is that of the privileged elite and that her book speaks primarily to parents in this socio-economic class. However, many of the issues she describes are applicable across all social and economic strata if in slightly different ways.I worked for many years at a nursing school that admitted students who were solidly middle class, not members of any elite. Because our tuition was less expensive than the universities that surrounded us we also had a fair number of students who would generally be classified as poor but ambitious and upwardly mobile.My experience with the majority of our students was fine. They worked hard and succeeded according to their abilities. However, there was an appreciable number of students [25-40%] who would have fit very well in Ms. Lythcott-Haims book. I remember vividly one student (21 years of age)who came into her interview with her mother. The mother refused to leave the interview and answered every question for her daughter. The daughter simply sat there. Whenever I asked the applicant a question she looked at her mother and said nothing. This situation was not really that uncommon. Parents frequently showed up at interviews. If they didn't come to the interview - many called. Mostly these parents told me how wonderful their child was, how caring and well suited for the nursing profession they were. Every year you had students who filled out their application to the program saying they wanted to be a nurse because their mother told them it was the right profession for them.
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